Why do guys keep photos of their exes reddit

Why do guys keep photos of their exes reddit

I don't think self decorum matters as much as making sure you don't live with regrets. I knew he had these things in there before, but not this much. We are still friends, and when I can, I take pics of him with the kids. They know they have other options and they move on to better options. It’s just something that bothers them and you A lot of guys do this, it's not uncommon. Coincidentally one of the ex’s was in their apartment with them when we were having our last argument and when they dumped me. That kinda messed me up. I think it's fine to hope your ex returns as long as it's not impeding your ability to live. . Same reason they keep pictures of themselves and any other friend from the past. It’s exciting and empowering at first. Because men would like to sleep with them one last time. coercedaccount2. But if you decide to date another person, I think it's just wrong to keep in contact. It’s not unhealthy having photos of you and your ex. Scrub them from profiles and keep them in an ex folder where I keep things relating to exes you never know how often some bits of information come in value later. On our first date he told me a little about his psychotic ex who literally body slammed his car windshield, kicked dents into his car door, broke his expensive guitar and sunglasses, threw his cologne out a car window, would try to choke him, hit him. Sex with exes is the best. There is no reason to keep photos of your ex. I don’t even talk to these people, some of them ended on bad terms. Not really in a yearning sense, but they do come to mind. Please keep the rules of r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Fits me perfectly. r/ExNoContact. That inability to get over an ex is a symptom of trying to fit the pieces back together in a way that makes sense, only the last time things made sense, that ex was a major part of his life. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. Yes they come back. Everyone's got their own reasons -- probably all of these and their individual situations, like: they got out of (or are in) a dramatic relationship and got nostalgic for how easy-going you were; they got out of (or are in) an emotionally unavailable relationship and thought of how they felt heard with you It’s not confusing at all. Unless the two of you have a child together or shared assets, do not keep their number on your phone. My ex was friends with two of their ex’s and during the last year we were dating, it seemed like they valued their ex’s more than they valued me as their partner. So yeah, you should delete your exes' nude Like they recount stories with their exes and honestly it sounds like they aren’t over them. With the way the dating field is a good lady is a rare thing. Anyways I hear he’s trying to make it work with his ex 🙄 so yeah stay away from men who talk about their ex. Try for as long as you can and the relapses will be shorter until you stop. I have many many pictures of my ex and I. His immediate response was that he was sharing it with a friend of his and had forgotten that it was there. If I were your boyfriend, I would be more concerned about your social media use than your ex's. They chose you and that should be the foundation of your thoughts. Skip to main content. I have been on a few first dates with men who always talk about exes and past relationships. They are not jealous or controling for being uncomfortable with the fact that your phone is full of photos of you and your ex kissing. Sometimes it's all an act that they don't follow through with. I wouldn’t even be friends with the ex if I wasn’t over it. So if you're a "friend" instead of a jilted/angry ex, then they can continue on with their lives, dusting their hands of any guilt and feeling relaxed while they go about their lives without you. Apparently, he was talking to some guys about boobs and he dug it up from an old email. As long as you dont have a significant other, then you do you. A relationship being over doesn't mean it stops being important, and not erasing all signs doesn't mean you/that person hasn't moved on. While being in a relationship. I just want to know other men’s POV of why they did the same thing? 1. Women are generally more likely to initiate a break up. Some people have tons of friends so for them having one extra in the form of an ex makes little difference. Be the first to comment Nobody's responded to this post yet. TIL to stay off of Reddit with personal issues. "Let's be friends" is another way of saying "I don't want you to dislike me even though For many different reasons: to test the waters, a sudden burst and need of affection, or simply by curiosity: bread-crumbing or to friend-zone you In any cases, you’re strong and doing great. He then proceeded to show me every girl he’s ever slept with, sex tapes and all. Try your best to be kind. Fast forwards two and a half months and we’re talking on a He's gaslighting you on the ex-gf's, he's already lied about it, is omitting the truth ect. STOP SEEING ALL OF THEM. Why do men safe keep those things; how come our relationship hasn’t made him realize that those pictures aren’t sacred for our relationship, and he should’ve deleted them i don’t know how to bring it up, i never had permission to look through it, and anytime i have a problem or insecurity, somehow it ends up my fault. 2. Not even close. A huge red flag to me is when men talk bad about their ex. I think it's good to know experiences they've had before to better understand where they are coming from in specific situations in the future and to avoid mistakes of the past. When dating someone new, you should start with a clean slate despite the past. I have my ex's hoodie and a t-shirt. Delete them. Just because the relationship might not work right now or there might be bits of it that don't work, doesn't mean there wasn't usually a lot of great Most average people like comfort. Also the court papers/documents may be required at a later date. He had several large boxes of things (>200 notes and letters, pictures, gifts, stuffed animals and such that he hadn't looked at in years, he just kept them boxed up) from his exes in his closet. Focus and yourself and move on. In a way their girlfriends where the only people who would be a true friend to them, listen to their problems and be there when they are down emotionally. Yep, you are over thinking. I don't keep anything from my exes unless it's an expensive item. . And nah with my exes any picture that has their face or body in is getting deleted once I’ve moved on. I don’t find it hard to keep my friendships platonic, even with exes. , 2017): lower satisfaction. as a girl, this has been my personal experience as well as that of most of my female Why do guys want to be friends with their exes? 110K subscribers in the AskPH community. obviously this is a generalization, and i know this isn’t everyone’s case, but i have heard/seen many statements about how girls are more ruined by the initial breakup, but move on after a few months and are completely ‘free’ from the relationship. And I don’t think most people hate their ex at all. I see zero need to keep them. I keep in touch with all my exes just in case they want to let me get up in them guts again. 1. But I keep the pictures bc for as much as I hate or don’t care about them anymore, they’re are a part of my history. Feb 20, 2024 · If you've been struggling to move on from a breakup, then you're definitely going to want to keep the photo evidence as far away from you as possible. Let your ex handle the breakup however he wants to.     Go to ExNoContact. Fun_Manufacturer4099. STOP SETTLING FOR COMFORT. I respectfully corralled all of these things together and did not poke into them Your partner is with you for a reason, they’re not with their ex. less felt validation. these are just a few things he told me about. Such as for example, you’re talking to someone new and they randomly say “My ex used to do that/like that/my ex and I did that/my ex would say” etc. Let them learn that lesson the hard way. there’s absolutely zero reason to bring up an ex into conversation that isn’t at all about exes/pasts. They soon realize it's easier to just fall back on a woman they already had because things are not panning out elsewhere. If you're not comfortable with it, leave but do not force someone you are in a brand new relationship with to abandon their own feelings, need for healing and reflection of the past. r/AskReddit A chip A close button A chip A close button Why do guys keep going back to their ex? What do they want? Weak men who pedestalize women do this. 90% of the time you'll end up where you started. That’s why a lot of times it’s best advised to break up and keep it moving . Everyone knows you don't bring up exes unless asked, and most people won't even ask about them, he's just showing off. " I think on top of that, the fact that you've spent time caring about someone imprints them in your mind. But after breaking up a lot of times the breakups are traumatic and it never really goes back to normal so it’s not really worth it. Women are more attracted to a man, if other women are attracted to him. When a man is hurt from love, the only thing that can actually heal him is love. Here it is everyone is wanting to find someone to date, but they are bringing in their past to the present. I also know I’d be super uncomfortable if someone I were dating had pics with their ex still, so it would be hypocritical of me to keep any. As a society, we're experiencing a decline in friendships which negatively affects people's mental health. and stay aways from exes lol However, at the end of it all, our lives are our own. You should tell him, since he regrets mistreating her, he is currently mistreating you by reminiscing about his ex, therefore he should stop moping and focus on the relationship he has with you. " If they're physical, put them in a shoebox in the back of your closet. After all even if you broke up, you probably were really proud to call them your SO, so why not be proud to show off your ex? It’s weird but a lot of guys do it. Those of you who lurk your exes because you're not over them furthered my paranoia. That, and I don’t date people who don’t So you're using a harem of exes you really don't want for companionship and to fulfill physical needs. Yep. By the way if you meet someone and they cover their ex with crap, it might be a red flag. •. It makes me think they are not over their past relationships. I’m tired of hearing some of you lurking on your exs WhatsApp DP or over analysing whatever statuses they post. Just remember, nudes never die. Like. Part of me moving on is not being involved in your life. Sorry abt your situation OP. Not as much of a chance for something unexpected to hurt him. While people sometimes do get back with their exes, imo once you've broken up that should be the end. The only thing we have is other men telling us to suck it up and move on. If a man’s ex pulls out while he is still totally committed, it can leave a lasting mental scar on him. Going back to your ex is easy and comfortable because it is familiar. less love Honestly I’m on her side. They also shouldn't hate all of their exes or say "all my exes are crazy". Why do people text their exes? As the title states ^. Do not bully or harass other users. I see you agreed with only specific comments on this post which very obviously exclaimed their disapproval at keeping ex’s photos and not the ones that didn’t. If you don't have kids and you're not ready to get rid of them, then don't. Any girl who finds them and get pissed is not mature enough to date, anyway. Basically he's a liar with a bad memorypeople like that can be really annoying and when confronted it will lead to a fight. Oddly, the ex I keep in contact with the most was the one I had the worst breakup with. I had an ex and kept some printed pictures for about a year or so. Not exclusive to men. With one of them there was almost daily conversation. Don't erase an entire part of your life just because pics have your ex in them. You do not get to control this. My now ex kept all her exes very close during our relationship, to the point that we even travelled together and stayed at their homes. If the person is deceased and that's how the relationship ended, it's understandable that you would keep photos. 121K subscribers in the OnlineDating community. 10 votes, 11 comments. Be single for a while. Oof you guys sound so toxic. I have a good relationship with my ex, we are great friends, but I would never go back to them. However, I noticed that some guys do not fully disclose their "ex Sep 18, 2021 · Compared to relationships that have never experienced a breakup, on-again partners tend to report (Dailey et al. • 3 yr. 7. That’s sus then. Most guys I know just say that it’s a memory from their life and why hide it etc. MembersOnline. no_sponsor_pays_me. Just because I don't want to have a romantic relationship with someone doesn't mean I can't admire their positive qualities and enjoy their friendship. Because they know women use pre-validation as an evaluation method. I will not ramble on so that I dont say thing I do not mean. I don't keep it as memorabilia, I keep it because it's a way to get back some of the money I wasted on the relationship. There's not as much mystery. They may want then in the future. Most of the replies here are from women. I guess some people enjoy keeping their memories, but for me they just hurt. To me, asking someone to get rid of them is like asking them to get rid of their memories. Throw it up in the cloud - password protect it, if you feel the need. That shouldn’t be your concern anymore, you’re just going to end up seeing something you’re Honestly keeping exes around is probably the most feasible attempt at keeping a harem of women around. • 2 yr. The focus of this subreddit is to ask and answer questions that elicit thought-provoking discussions, as…. You should say to your boyfriend that it's not appropriate to you to mention his ex like that. "People" reach out to their exes to get closure, because they are in a bad place in their relationship and romanticize the past & lose focus on why that relationship ended, because they know their ex will respond and they can open a relationship door to make them feel better for a brief Unless it’s like an everyday thing or very constant then tread lightly with them it means the ex is something on their mind a lot. Men heal from a break up different than women do. At least once a day. Now, this isn't all men. Your partner is allowed to have a past and hold on to memories as they please. Award. Do not call people names or engage in slapfights. Usually if the current one is terrible. Even if it hurt us both at first. He's still around and doing pretty good. I hold on to them so my kids have pictures of their dad to look back at and remember him. I care about the person and wish them well, but I need to focus on myself first. I feel, that when you are in a relationship, you constantly step on eachothers values and stances I think the reason that saying " my ex was such a psycho bitch" is a red flag is because there is still emotion tied to that statement. Where as "she struggled with mental health" is a more detached and analytical response. Do not ask a question when you’re looking for a specific cherry picked answer to it and not the whole truth. Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home. No contact. I’m talking about the situation when you and your ex broke up a long time ago and you have a new SO. He called his ex “my girlfriend at the time”. Now when I wear them I most times don't even remember it was his. Hell, my photo collage wall I made earlier this year has a couple pictures of my ex-wife on it too. Blocking is either because you're buggin them and they want you to go away, or its because they still feel something and need to not see you/hear from you. If you don't fit together it doesn't mean you need to cover your ex with garbâge. Our members listen, support, and encourage each other on their path to independence. Because breaking up doesn't mean being hostile towards that person. Remaining friends is because they were once very good or best friends. These women think he has a soft spot for them when he doesn’t and is hitting up all his exes. Keep some special ones like with family holidays or now dead family members. Not because they want you, not because they love you, and not even for sex, well sometimes for sex, but ALWAYS because they crave for attention. I scrolled through and saw a picture of a naked female (just her body, no face) who turned out to be his ex-girlfriend. Strong men won't put up with all the nonsense, they aren't wishy-washy. I won't revisit the pics of the ex until I am fully over them though. No need in taking a step back If they're digital, put them in a folder marked "old pictures. I mentioned my ex once to balance it out lol. I have lots of photos of my ex mixed in with vacationphotos, day to day photos etc. If you think about how male friendships tend to bw and how female friendships are it all starts to make sense. Download them into a bloc offer them copies if they want them. You already tried joking about itthat doesn't work. Nope, no reason to be friends with exes. If you have children together, keep them. If you want, you can DM me. If you share a child with the ex, it's likely that there would be photos of all of you together. Add your thoughts and get the conversation going. Do not soapbox or promote an agenda - you will be banned. MoustachedPotatoes. We're only in control of us. I'm sorry that it makes you uncomfortable, and that is a sucky situation, but unfortunately, it just happens and there's not much you can do about it. Just a thought. But these dudes need to heal. It’s plain rude and disrespectful. This guy approached me at school and pretty much in the first five minutes I friend zoned because I could tell what kind of guy he was. 4. An ex is a known quantity. Then I forgot all about them. Especially if you're younger and haven't had many relationships. I would never show the naked ones to anyone else. How do men feel when they see their exes are doing better? Went to the same party my ex was at, we hadn't seen eachother in months and I noticed he stared at me some, even though he was with his new gf. He caused enough damage and no need to go through this anymore. Reply reply. , 2009; Dailey et al. For me anyway, it stems from the fact that I stood so long and was in denial for quite some time about the toxicity of the relationship. 5 years of NC my ex told me she 'still cares about me' just 2 weeks a go. We're not in control of other people. Most guys won’t admit it but it’s a sort of flex. I just really like that hoodie. No need to have reminders of the pain from the breakup. Maybe thats why these men can never fully emotionally let go of their exes. Reply. Half the time they don't even know why they do what they do. Even now, 3 years since BU and 1. Do men miss their exes too? : r/ExNoContact. "So and so band is coming to town, I think I last saw them with ex 1 . Strangely enough all the times I’ve broken ip with my ex’s its been positive. ago. I don’t think girls hate their exes more than guys. ADMIN MOD. Men don't get as much intimacy as women. But if you're one to live with regrets, then it may be wiser to move forward with blinders. It almost seems like you are hand picking out reasons to have an issue Don’t delete them unless you want to. Not for opinions, not for relationship advice, and not for preaching. Yes I keep them, also clothed pictures, because they are good memories. Gift ideas, date concepts, favorite places etc. That's not a bad thing, just a thing. Outside of that, it's your phone and your choice, but don't be shocked if someone asks about it. My exes aren’t close friends, but the relationship ended for a reason and I wouldn’t have a new partner if I wasn’t over that. Be polite and respect each other. The more friends the better. Did you just wanna know if she had someone else/ or if she moved on? My ex has been stalking me on social media for 11 months now , he didn’t want to stop talking to me but i did what i felt like was best for the both of us due to the relationship being so toxic …. Your ex seems like he's hopping from person to person without any breaks in between because he needs his supply and to fill the void of his insecurities. Dec 19, 2017 · Receiving a nude from the hot person you’re dating is a privilege, and when you no longer share that intimacy, you don’t get that privilege anymore. Depends on the context. For the guys I know that hate their ex, the gf ignored them or cheated on them. Everything about online dating - your amusing stores, advice, and encouragement when you need it. Others have very few friends and giving up a friendship is a big deal. You need to be able to hold intelligent conversation - or at least keep up appearances by letting them have their small talk and just going with it. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. 3. My ex when I left him to save my own sanity and was sick of his irresponsibility and grifting and tricking people to give him money instead of keeping a steady form of employment (“I work around people younger than me, even my boss is younger, the place should put workers in positions by age order, I am the oldest so I should be the head supervisor not that I appreciate men who voluntarily open up about their past relationships at the early stages of dating. Its driving me crazy. Guys have to pursue more and really go out to meet someone because online dating is not as promising. But for the girls I know that hate their ex, the bf was abusive or cheated on them. I would personally suggest it's a self-preservation tactic, as well as what the other person said in that more negative memories linger longer. Then when enough validation or time as occurred they toss you again for other people. I have hundreds of pictures of not only ex’s but also ex friends. The reality is that women are usually more attracted to men who are more sociable, even if they are geeks or dorks. Is this a red flag? I just got off a call with a guy and he mentioned his ex like 3 times. Initially took it from him because I wanted to have his scent in my closet but after our breakup, it just became a part of my wardrobe. So why do you need to meet anyone new? Keeping these guys around is preventing you from dating new people. The only exes I follow are ones who were brief, didn't work out, but we're still cool with each other. Every break up I've had as been painful and I do think about my exes a lot for a while even if I was the one who ended things. Ex No Contact is a breakup support group focused on self-reliance and general healing. All advice given must be good, ethical advice. I have 2-3 exs that i know would take me seriously if i chose to date again. Reminds me of this video where men and women where asked to say something to say their ex, all the men said positive stuff and all the women said negative stuff. Depends, They come back just the same but it seems to be just to use you as validation because some new people hurt their feelings or disappointed them so they go back to the safety net. Women give each other this while men do not have that. That caused all sorts of problems in our relationship and resentment because she was determined to keep these exes in her life because they were "family". It’s not acceptable to do as I’m sure he’d feel shitty knowing you had nudes of any ex. I’ve always been a firm believer of “they are an ex for a reason”. throatpunchnixon-. Usually no. Define your dating standards and STICK TO THEM. Do not post hateful or harmful rhetoric - you will be banned. So anywhere between "took off forever when she said she was pregnant" to "will stay with the mother through anything their entire lifes". Plus-Implement. Did any of you have their exes come back? I really want to burn that hope off of my brain. Weak men also want easy sex. Guys with kids are not a hive mind. And of just my ex. It can absolutely push people away when they constantly speak of their ex because it makes it feel like they care more for the past person than the present. That’s always been my belief. Helga-Zoe. [deleted] A place to get personal things off your chest. But I’ve grown to not resent any of them and just don’t really care for them. Some guys keep them as a collection almost, some guys are photo hoarders any way. I didn’t even give him an explanation just silence. I never, ever reached out to my ex and I wasn't the one who lied/cheated whereas he was. I'm objectively prettier and fitter than I was when I was with him, and humbly, objectively better than new gf. 57K subscribers in the relationships_advice community. Tbh, you are dodging a bullet with these dudes. Then from there you need to block everything about their ex don’t let yourself look at their profile. So, why do you - if you do at all - look at your ex's page? Edit: Those of you who suggested that I'm an overreacting weirdo made me feel better. Some people hate their exes because their exes were disrespectful or just plain mean to them near the end. I'm still working on become more securely attached as being an avoidant but I've been through all this before, to a lesser extent, in that women were just a means Yes, I do miss my ex, and what we had together, but honestly as I've stayed single since then, I do feel like I'm just missing the idea of being in a relationship. Less important than pictures from the past is whether or not new pictures are going up. In other words, no real emotional involvement. Knowing that your partner broke up peacefully, shows so much more about them. However he still wouldn’t shut tf up about her, I ended up ghosting him after the first date because I am not your rebound who will become your new mommy-girlfriend. Follow reddit rules. For redundancy in case something fails. Edit again: So, I just spoke with my boyfriend about this. We have two kids together, and he's dying. If your significant other is still angry with their ex, that usually means there are still unresolved feelings towards "this doesn't apply to all men" after "why can't men do x y z" Si you just say "why are my exes doing x y z"?? Anyway to answer, maybe you are a catch compared to the average lady and that's why your exes are regretting leaving you. I keep all pics on Google drive, passports, and cds. So when you have a guarantee from your past It's easy to slip back into bad old habits. I usually get random texts from them. It happens more often than usual. You know where it is, but nobody will be stumbling over it. Im thinking about her and about all the new guys she started to follow on instagram and how shes moving on whereas Im upset about someone that does not and did not care. Share your experiences/thoughts! The background for this is that my ex (who was an exchange student from France) decided to text me after she ended things saying that she didn’t want to ever build something long term with me. Add Because they feel hurt and rejected and bruised, an they feel like they gave them everything (somewhat) an they feel angry over all the time they spent together which would now be considered as time wasted and they get sad so they just hate them. As title suggests, (not taking into account current relationship status) but I (23,F) am just curious on guys’ perspectives of whether they tend to remember or think about ex girlfriends years later, even if the relationship didn’t last that long. It certainly is not because he values you or misses you. "Having your ex around — even if just in Be polite and respect each other. I dont have a clue why, could be the sex, could be the honesty i came with, frankly i dont get it. We keep in contact because it's fun to see how our lives and the lives of our siblings change over the years. sq bw oe zd hr hf xl gu ch ja